Wednesday, November 21, 2007

remembering to remember

The thought of you still makes my mind swirl.
A single dream turns into an obsession,
And I awake, deep in regret.
The thought of us pains me still, of what could have been, of what would have been.
I spend the day thinking of you and me, of how everything was alright and then suddenly, it wasn’t. Everything is done. Promises have been broken and new ones made. Lives have changed.
As I sit here, trying so hard, to love another… I pull back, scared again, that I might fall, that I might lose myself, or lose Him.
I wonder about doing things for the glory of God. I wonder whether I have done anything which has been in His perfect will. Then I remember why things happened the way they did. I remember our negotiations, about God, family and love. I remember indifference.
And I remind myself to remember, that greater things wait ahead.

"That men may know that thou, whose name alone is Jehovah, art the most high over all the earth." Psalms.