i mean no disrespect.

He's amazing, I keep telling her. So amazing. He's got lovely eyes, you HAVE to see his eyes and his hands are so big!

Stop being obsessed with size, she says.

I AM not! I just mean that mine look tiny in comparison and I like that. I have big hands. See? Awkward hand twirl follows.

Is he a nice person?

I'm sure. He seems quite nice.

Quite?

Like, the normal amount of nice. He loves kids and all that, but not like 'I spend all my free time doing good things for other people.' 

Well, don't forget, she says to me, looking me straight in the eye, he's still single. And he's OLD! Not just older!

So what? Good for me, right? I'm not into the whole 'let's steal him from that girl' thing. And older men have always had a special appeal.    

Maybe he has commitment issues, she offers.

--Well, who doesn't? In this day and age, which half-happy/sane person doesn't think twice about sharing their life with one person forever and ever and ever. That is a lot to commit to. It's not as if someone decides for you, it's a huge thing, to take responsibility for changing your happiness like that. I think commitment is really easy for miserable people. Pass the buck, right? 

And women, I'm sorry, are generally passive. So many women are ready to get married, ready to get into relationships, ready to make a promise, without thinking it through. And then they're ready to blame the guy when it starts to fall apart. I only know from my own experience and that of friends, I'm sure there are exceptions, or maybe these women are the exceptions. I think it's pretty unfair when women judge men for having commitment issues. I judge women for not having them.--

Anyway, I continue. You must look at his eyes the next time you see him. 

Dude, he's a fucking celebrity. Grow up. 

Hmph!